Look, he cheated on Kate, and that’s bad enough. It’s a sign that a relationship is irretrievably broken. Lots of Team Justin followers are willing to overlook that. Their prerogative, but I think they’d feel differently if they were the ones at the other end of that.
No, why Justin annoys me is that he tells Kate what she thinks and, at a critical moment, won’t even let her complete one significant sentence without interrupting multiple times. I think this mode of operation has been in place all along, and Kate’s just finally waking up to the mechanism. It’s still too early for her to be really angry about it, though.
From the 2nd season closer, episode Finale:
"Here we go."
"Oh, god, what?"
"Nothing, I just know you, that’s all."
"Look, this is the, uh … , right needle, wrong haystack. I’ve been fighting this feeling—"
"Oh, my, Kate—"
"…and I keep hoping—"
"Don’t do this."
"…that this is going to feel right—"
"It does feel right. We’re not who we used to be, don’t do this.”
"I know you think that I’m running away."
"Yeah, because you are. I knew you were gonna get scared."
"I’m not scared."
Justin nods his head yes.
Look, if you ever ever ever have this kind of conversation with a man, where he constantly interrupts you and tells you what you think, run away now. This is not someone who ever will truly respect your feelings or what you have to say.
Also, there are those who don’t like Ben because he’s “manipulative” and they perceive Justin isn’t. All three people in the triangle are manipulative, but I’d put Justin’s as the worst because he’s fundamentally trying to have Kate be someone other than who she is.
Ben manipulates situations where Kate gets to make the call about what happens. As he says in Borderline, “You’re the decider.” And he means that not just about her being a magistrate, but about everything.
Kate’s manipulativeness is really about trying to appear to Ben that she’s more available than she is while simultaneously keeping him at arm’s length. Fortunately, he sees through that.